Reddit Backs Bride Who Fired Bridesmaid for Revealing Disability Diagnosis at Bachelorette Party
A woman was furious when one of her bridesmaids revealed a disability diagnosis during her bachelorette party, taking attention away from her. Ultimately, she decided to fire the friend from her bridal party.
Sharing her story on Reddit, the bride explained that during the party, one of her bridesmaids took her aside and told her "she was diagnosed with fetal alcohol syndrome" about three months ago.
"Obviously I asked her what that meant for her and she started crying because she feels differently about her relationship with her mother. We met in elementary school and she’s always had a learning disability, but she didn’t know that there was a preventable cause. My other bridesmaids noticed her crying, and the evening ended up being about her," the bride noted.
With everyone upset, the bachelorette party ended early, with attendees skipping out on going to a bar in a limo that the bride paid for.
"I thought about it all today and ended up emailing her to tell her that she took away an important moment from my life. I feel bad about this happening to her, but even though she didn’t always know it’s been going on for her whole life. If this was a recent thing she found out about or it was some kind of deadly disease I would feel differently, but she was sitting on this for months before bringing it up at an event that was supposed to be special to me," the bride shared.
The bride felt her bachelorette party was "totally overshadowed" by her friend's revelation.
"I felt really hurt that she did that, and told her that I didn’t want to have her in my wedding if that’s how she’s going to treat me at a time where the focus was supposed to be something good in my life instead of something sad in hers. She could have waited a few more weeks until after the wedding if she wanted to have this conversation," the woman recalled, adding that while the friend is "still invited to the wedding," she's no longer a bridesmaid.
In the comments section, users felt bad for the woman's diagnosis but supported the bride's decision to cut her from the wedding party.
"The bachelorette and the wedding are meant to be some of the best days of your life, and I don’t think there is anything wrong with choosing to protect your happiness in those moments… No one is entitled to being in a wedding party, and making someone else’s special day all about you is a good reason to be cut out of one," one person wrote.
"Realizing that a friend is the kind of person who will hijack your happy moment to make the situation about them (even unintentionally) may have made [you] fear that something similar would happen at the wedding," another commented.
"She had 3 months to process her diagnosis and ask for support from friends. The thing that really angers me is that she turned a special moment that was supposed to be about having fun into something sad. And quite literally ruined your plans by using social pressure, because if you wanted to go to the bar anyway you would have looked like you don't care about her. I honestly wouldn't invite her to the wedding until she apologizes, because this seems intentional," someone else shared.